I'm crying with the shame of this
story...
One day when I was a nipper I was going through my most furious
fist and the furious stage (a billion times a day or something).
Well anyway I had a thing for Jet from Gladiators (the shame)and
had recorded the previous nights episode on my massive video.
Anyway while watching it Jet was about to do her speciality - the
over head rings thing - and I defy any man to not find that a turn
on! Feeling randy I watched her lift her right leg really high in
the air! Being well turned on I paused the video and proceeded to
thrash one out.
So I had my trousers round my ankles and was stood in front of the
TV, well into the vinegar strokes when my door swung open and there
was my Dad!!!! Sh*t! As I was facing the door there was no way he
couldn't tell what I was doing! Within the same second our
extremely excitable dog barged into the room and jumped up at me at
the very same time my purple monster spurted my man milk! The dog
got it full in the face and I fell backwards onto the bed, c*ck in
hand!
My Dad was bright red and tried to chase the dog out of the room
while I started crying and tried to hide my shame! Burying my face
in the pillow I really really wanted to die....then out of the
quiet and my muffled sobs I heard my Dad say "I prefer Lightning to
that Jet" then he closed the door!
Sometime later I ventured downstairs and into the kitchen fearing
laughs and ridicule only to be greeted with the sight of my Dad
washing the Dog out in the yard!!!!!
Dad I salute you!
Come baby come baby, baby come come
I remember this like it was yesterday (even though it was about 12
years ago). I was bashing away in my living room to the video to
Come Baby Come by K7, with my parents in the next sh*tting room,
fer chrissakes (this must have been during my 'horny as a dog'
phase). My mum walked in, I covered my shame with a nearby cushion
and hoped that she didn't notice. But she did.
Only she didn't think I was wanking. If she did, the story wouldn't
have been half as bad. No, she thought I had taken a biscuit from
the kitchen, and thought she'd engage me in a bit of jovial tug of
war with the cushion covering my rapidly shrinking penis. This went
on for about 30 seconds, her laughing as she tried to shed light on
my supposed theft, me terrified I'd flash my mum and she'd find out
I was flogging the horse to a music video.
Eventually, she noticed the sweat dripping down my forehead and my
teenage grip won out against her maternal tugging. I turned away,
c*ck still hanging out, and ran down the corridor, laughing
maniacally. To this day, I don't know whether she figured it out or
not.
This is a question reply OK
When I was 19 I broke my leg rather badly in an accident with a
motorbike and as a result I had to spend almost 6 months in
hospital in traction.
It was a long hot summer and the nurses uniforms often caught the
light in such a way that they became translucent and almost full
view of her lacy bra, the sight of inner thigh and the occasional
glimpse of stocking top often greeted my eye and drove my mind to
thoughts of lust.
There was one rather fine blonde ward sister with whom I became
besotted; she was very fit, firm, rounded and very, very sexy. We
got on well and shed often talk to me and bring me an extra cup of
tea or a nice biscuit, I fancied her like crazy and so one day I
could contain myself no more.
To get the curtains pulled around my bed I buzzed said ward sister
and asked for a bedpan she as usual obliged and we exchanged a few
pleasantries. As she bent over the bed I had a clear view of her
b.reasts and I was in the mood for tossing my caber more than I can
explain, Id not been on a solo flight for about 4 months, in fact
Id not been for an evacuation for probably 5 or 6 and now was
the time, I was going to go for it.
She drew the curtains, I relaxed and took myself in hand and began
tugging away fervently like a madman
It didnt take long till I
felt myself reaching the point of final exit so I polished away
with even more gusto when suddenly and without warning the nurse
walked back in through the curtains with a cheery Sorry, did I
leave my stethoscope in here?.
She caught me in my full on c*mface. I dont know if it was the
sight of her, the shock, or if it was just poor timing but as she
stood there staring at me. I exploded down below and covered myself
from head to toe in my own sticky man goo.
Ill get a cloth she said Then you can clean yourself up
She never brought the incident up again, but she also talked to me
less and less and the teas and biscuits became fewer and farer
between.
I was never more embarrassed.
Best fap of my life though.
Speed wank
A few years back (about 7) my girlfriend lived up in a posh bit of
Surrey, while I lived 70 miles away in Sussex. After one
particularly frustrating and blue-ball inducing night with her on
the sofa I set off home early on Sunday morning.
I was driving back down the deserted M25 and came up with the
stunning idea of rubbing out out while driving. I slid the seat
back to get a bit of leg room, moved over to the slow lane and
settled at a steady 70mph in my £600 Metro. Content with the
conditions I unzipped myself and set to work. Everything was going
fine, and I kept an eye on the rear view mirror. This little trick
meant I had plenty of time to tuck the old chap away the few times
a car overtook me.
As I was about to finish the job something happened that I hadn't
planned, ploughing down on the left had side of me (and therefore
completely out of view) from the slip road was a coach full of
soldiers that got a birds eye view of me spunking my load all over
myself and the dashboard while swerving across 3 lanes of motorway
at the sudden approach of 50 overhead spectators.
